Wednesday, December 24, 2008
The Pleasure Principle
What makes you feel good about yourself? Different people look to different things for pleasure. Of course, what pleasures are available to them is often determined by circumstance, yet as a person grows he/she has a certain amount of control over his/her destiny - and thus the pleasures that are available to him/her.
I contend that the pleasures available to a person determines the person's beliefs - for everyone will believe what makes them feel good about themselves. This is all fine and dandy in theory, but in the real world, people are not born equal. Some are rich; Some are poor; Some a beautiful; Some are ugly - To varying degrees of course.
This explains alot about what drives people to do what they do. When there is wealth, hedonistic pleasures are abundant. It is not surprising that in the first world, people tend to turn to hedonistic pleasures to feel good about themselves. It feels good to indulge yourself with worldly possessions and pastimes such as clubbing. When wealth is scarce, people have a tendency to turn to a belief system to feel good about themselves. Native people have ceremonies and rituals. Others turn to religion (whatever it may be) to give them a sense of purpose. It can be argued that religion does exist in the first world, but the reality is that when push comes to shove, people seek pleasure from hedonism and not religion - and that is where their allegence lies (despite technically having inherited a religion. no longer practiced of course). It's no coincidence that religion has been cast aside to funerals/marraiges and festive holidays in wealthy first world countries.
In the the game of love, the pleasure principle explains alot of what I have been experiencing. I am an honest person. When asked about why I go to the gym, my answer is as short and concise as possible - "to be more attractive to the girls...duh". I've been observing people's initial responses to that answer, and I have (subjectively) noticed a trend. Attractive/beautiful people's first response tends to be supportive (eg. "oh..that's wonderful"). Less-attractive people are less likely to do so. More importantly, the less attractive people are likely to give me a short lecture on why looks are not important (!). It was almost as if they took offence to my statement. Could it be that (physically) unattractive people are telling themselves that raw physical attractiveness is not as important as character/charm to feel good about themselves? It's a question that begs to be answered... As far as I know, girls are just as attracted by raw animal magnetism as guys. The girls that say they just want a sweet, nice, guy never realize that they only notice the "sweet, nice" characteristics of the guys with reasonably hot bodies. Similarly, guys tend to notice the good characteristics of the pretty girls. Many girls dont want to believe that raw physical attraction plays a key role in finding a partner, but in reality, how many couples (when they first met, early 20s) do you know of where the guy is both shorter and lighter than the girl? Ultimately girls do not notice the "nice" characteristics of guys who are both shorter and lighter than they are - and this is why physical build is important to a guy in the game of love.
I am not denying that character and cultural values also play a part in the game of love, but to deny the value of animal magnetism is to live a lie. Indeed, the attractive people are usually cautious and do mention that looks arent everything, after supporting my pursuit to increase my raw animal magnetism. The unattractive people often dont support my pursuit at all and they seem to hold strongly to the idea that they are somehow unaffected by raw animal magnetism - a belief/conviction (I contend) that makes them feel good about themselves.